On March 11, 1973, President Richard M. Nixon and H. R. ("Bob") Haldeman talked on the telephone from 10:03 am to 10:19 am. The White House Telephone taping system captured this recording, which is known as Conversation 037-077 of the White House Tapes.
Transcript (AI-Generated)This transcript was generated automatically by AI and has not been reviewed for accuracy. Do not cite this transcript as authoritative. Consult the Finding Aid above for verified information.
Yeah.
Yes, sir.
Well, did you survive the gridiron?
Yeah.
It wasn't much, really.
How long to go?
Oh, till 1130 or something like that.
It was a long, drawn-out thing, but it was...
uh how'd everybody do how'd mcgovern do mcgovern did extremely well really that's good he uh we want him to do well you know for what he did was someone wrote him a extremely good speech it was very funny some very good gags and almost all of them at his expense a few they were rather sharp a little bit maybe a little bit too sharp but
And there were a couple at you and the Republicans and all, but it was mainly...
It was supposed to be.
...mainly turned on himself.
And the highlight of it was he said that he gave a little spiel about how people had criticized his $1,000 welfare plan and said they couldn't understand it.
And he admitted he'd been a little confused about it too, but now he had it all worked out and he'd like to explain it since that was the opportunity.
And he went into a whole, probably a three-minute or four-minute thing that was just a marvelous sort of takeoff on internal revenue gobbledygook, you know, where he said,
for those earning over $8,475 but less than $22,917, assuming that they were working more than 17 days a month and, you know, a gag like that.
And that sort of brought the house down.
It was very clever.
Most of our people will not understand this, but this is exactly what I wanted to have happen.
So that he doesn't destroy himself.
We've got to keep him very much alive.
He got a...
very lukewarm reception at the beginning some people stood most people didn't and uh but at the end uh he got a good round of applause because he did a good job and bush too bush did okay he wasn't about what we expected yeah he was perfectly respectable and you know didn't didn't do anything bad uh
He is not a good gag man.
He had some moderately good material, not really good.
How were the songs and so forth and so on?
Songs were, I would say, not nearly as barbed as they have been in the past.
Everybody had the feeling that it was much more of a...
of a back to sort of good fellowship type thing instead of the which it used to be sort of bitter stuff that was before yeah i sat next to old mr breyman from rhode island and he was talking about how he pleased he was he's been the gridiron 40 years and he said this was
back to the way it was supposed to be.
They're trying to do that.
That's good.
Did you stay around Eppers at all?
No.
That's good.
That's always a bore.
No, I went over ahead of time, bounced around, hit all the things, but I left at the end.
How was the morale of people over there?
Very good.
Speaking there.
Very good.
I think actually the, I'll be interested in this church thing, but I think actually the morale of people is better
And we run across here.
They had three POWs there, an enlisted sergeant, enlisted man, Air Force sergeant, and an officer, and a civilian foreign servant.
I guess, though, they had the three POWs, and they introduced them at the end.
And they got, of course, a very extended, prolonged standing ovation.
And then at the end of that, the gridiron said that they...
They wanted to return to the tradition of the first bandmaster of the Gridiron, John Philip Sousa.
And they thought it would be appropriate under the circumstances tonight that we do that or something.
And the Marine band struck up the Stars and Stripes Forever.
They had a huge flag across the back of the stage.
And all the Gridiron members, the singers, came on wearing red, white, and blue Stars and Stripes hats and stood up there and sang a song about that we should return to the old flag-waving finale.
And that kind of caught everybody up, too.
They built that.
Oh, you should know, McGovern at the start of his, or not the start, at the end, when he went to his serious thing at the end, he said that he's supposed to be serious, but he said, fortunately,
I can be joyful while I'm serious because tonight, for the first time in 10 years, the Gridiron Club is meeting with the United States not at war.
And he said that some of us had hoped that peace would come sooner, and others felt that it was— Part of this, of course, as you know, is—
as a result of him and his people reading the tea leaves.
I'm sure you understand that.
No question.
That's good.
Agnew had a pretty good... Everybody, the comment all the way around after the McGovern speech was that someone had written a hell of a good speech and that he was damn smart to have given it.
When Agnew did his closing thing, he said something.
He commended Senator McGovern for his...
going out well-delivered address or something you know then he said the only thing i can say is i am deeply thankful that he didn't find that writer until after the election oh boy which brought a big laugh yeah uh yeah it wasn't bad well that's good though that's just that's it that's a that's a good thing and they in the musical and the songs the the mcgovern song of course was the finale of the democrats skit mcgovern was an angel or a
prophet or something in a white robe with a halo above him and carrying a Bible.
And he sang to the tune of They Call the Wind, Mariah.
He sang, and I was their Messiah.
Right.
It must have been a good show.
Let me ask you with regard to the gridiron.
I called about a couple of things.
I think that with regard to the POWs,
I noticed Perot is off and running, and he's already got a date of June the 2nd for a big thing in the heart of Texas, in other words, for the heart of America thing for the POWs, and with Bob Hope and all that, you know, and so forth and so on.
We cannot allow that thing to get out of control.
And if that's the case, we've got to go first, as you know.
Absolutely.
Yeah.
Do you think you can do anything about it?
Sure.
With whom?
Well, we'll go one way or the other.
Either change boroughs, which is what they want to do, or move ours up earlier.
Well, that's what I was thinking.
Just move ours to the 28th of May, one month afterwards.
The idea of it having to be on Flag Day, that's a public relations gimmick.
That isn't necessary.
When you've got a great event, you don't need a day to put the event on.
So my view is that I wouldn't horse around, though.
You know how these people are.
You've got all the God and the stars.
Now, the other thing is whether or not his doing that thing will...
He'll do in the Sammy Davis thing.
Oh, well, he'll let him do that and let that be it.
Maybe that's the best thing to do.
It may be.
That's a hard thing to handle and let him have his day.
Why don't we do that?
Put him in touch with Sammy Davis and all those other people.
Then we don't have to do the thing.
But the main point that I want to be sure, Bob, is that we get control of this immediately and that somebody follows up.
I mean, obviously, we cannot go after they go, right?
We cannot go after they go, right?
Absolutely.
We've got to track that one back one way or the other, and that was the thing Reisner was concerned about.
I am going to move, since you've invited Reisner and the others, I'm going to move that affair for the Ehrlichman thing.
The cost of living?
The cost of living.
I'm going to move it back 24 hours.
In other words, they've got to, and then if you can talk to John, get him and say that I'm going to just move it to exactly 3 o'clock the following day, Tuesday.
Tuesday, okay.
Right.
Now, and then tell him that since that gives him 24 hours, that what I want is that I want the departments to come in with their views as well as our comments.
Mike?
and giving them hell for what they're, you know, to say, tell them what to do.
And that we expect each of them to come in with some positive things that they can do.
Okay.
And that gives them 24 hours more, which I think is a good idea anyway.
Over the weekend, you know, with the gridiron and the rest, and everything, I just aren't sure that they all... Good.
They all will get their thing done, because I didn't meet till Friday afternoon, and I could see that...
I've probably given them too much of a deadline.
That way we'll leave the POWs open for Monday, and I have nothing Tuesday afternoon anyway, do I?
Right.
No.
Right.
Now, you've got Buchanan to work for a book.
Tuesday night.
Tuesday night.
That's good.
7 o'clock.
No, 7.30.
Okay.
Okay.
It was still the proper thing for me not to be there, don't you think?
Absolutely.
No reason for me.
And it was the Republican skit was not, it was, it would have been bad with you there.
They did it as King Richard's Court, you know, and did an overdrawn thing about that.
Well, I don't mind that.
I just want to, isn't that part, but I don't, it isn't, as Henry said, it isn't well for me to be there with McGovern.
Because it only allows him to get well, and as it is, nobody's going to pay a goddamn bit of attention to this except those over there.
That's right.
And if they build him up, that's great.
And McGovern, the way it came off, McGovern did well.
I don't think he'll come off as a smash hit or anything.
It's funny, I had quite a long talk with Robert Strauss, the Democratic chairman.
Yeah, before dinner.
That was after the McGovern speech, you know, when everybody goes out for a seat sitting next to you.
Oh, yeah.
No, it was outside, and then I walked out with him at the end also, but...
He is a pretty blunt guy.
He said, you know, you guys have the wrong view of McGovern.
We were talking about his speech, and he said, you all think he's such an evil man.
He said, there isn't that evil bone in his body.
He's not an evil man at all.
He is just absolutely, totally stupid.
He said, he is the dumbest man I have ever met or dealt with.
And he just went on and on.
Well, at least McGovern never listened to anybody.
That's right.
Yeah.
Strauss is a very blunt character.
He had nothing good to say about McGovern.
Was Connolly there?
No.
Connolly's in Jamaica.
They had a Connolly song in the Democrat skit.
Was Beebe there?
Did they have anything on him?
Yeah, he was there and they introduced him.
And they...
Ran a skit on him probably, that's why.
No, they didn't do a skit on him.
Oh, they had him in that dialogue thing.
When they ask people to stand up in the audience.
And then they go in and then they do a little gag about it.
I know that routine.
It's been about three years.
They had Lucy Winchester and Rosemary Woods and B.B.
Rebozo.
Right.
And I'd forgotten what the gag was.
Well, I know what it is.
I know that thing.
Sure, sure, that's fine.
A little dialogue, yeah.
Well, good, I'm glad they could all go.
They probably got a kick.
How many women were there just
Not many.
You weren't really aware that there were any, you know, to speak of.
Very minimal.
They had Larry Brown there at the head table.
Gave him a huge ovation.
He got the biggest hand of anybody when he was introduced.
Larry Brown.
Bigger than the POWs?
No, no.
Oh, no.
No, no.
No.
I mean of the people around the...
P.O.W.s was a special thing at the end.
That was a good number.
It was very big.
I think people came away probably feeling pretty good.
They weren't very rough on everybody.
The Kissinger song wasn't bad.
They did it to Wunderbar.
Why don't we just move ours to exactly one month after the other one, Bob?
Just to
rather than having it June the 14th, why not May the 28th?
That'd be two months, which is March 28th.
You see what I mean?
I mean, just get the... Well, I understand.
I just want to give you the leeway.
You do it then or...
Right.
That's a good idea.
Two months afterwards.
That's a good idea.
That's a logical time.
A logical time.
60 days.
And then... 60 days to release them.
60 days for them to get home and get settled.
And they get the word out.
And then they can have the other one on the second.
You see what I mean?
Because he's probably got the Astrodome and all that sort of thing.
Wow.
But you see, there's one problem that concerns me about the POWs.
You know how it is with all-America football players and so forth.
This is somewhat the same, but, of course, not quite the same.
But people get tired of applauding heroes.
They really do.
And, you know, they see them and all the rest.
Now, if this is pissed away, it's just not good, and they shouldn't go running around.
They get tired of their astronauts, for example.
They'll get tired of these guys awful quick.
You agree?
And I'm sure Riesner and the others will realize it.
But I don't want them to be tired by the time they get here.
So I'd let Perot go forward on the Hollywood part of it and just leave it for him.
Let him produce the whole damn thing.
Don't you think so?
Keeps us out of it.
Really, it's kind of a good thing to let someone else work.
And let him do it in terms of what we do.
And if they get to the point where I attend or anything,
That's a question of what happens is where they get national television and all the rest.
Okay?
Right.
All right.
Very good.
All right.